We are sometimes faced with an emergence of a age old belief when it comes to competition. A righteousness of competing in life that is based on survival. Thanks to Charles Darwin and British Economist Herbert Spencer, it is the “survival of the fittest” we are told.
Whom do we compete with? Do we compete with everyone we come across in our journey through life?
As a child, many are coerced into this “competition” thanks to their overzealous family, as a young adult this is heightened during the college years and later on at the workplace.
We waste a lot of our time pursuing the “methods” of making effective conquests wherever we go. One of the causes of discontentment with existence is overthinking about others and their role in our life and success. An indulgence that is a sheer wastage of time and effort. In fact this is a toxic activity that takes our focus off matters that are crucial and relevant to our life.
As parents, the more we show an inclination to remind our children to find out the performance of others in a test, the less we are enabling them to grow as confident adults, who have a zest for life. Instead of heightening their awareness about other’s ability to perform better than them, encouraging them to observe and learn the admirable practices followed by fellow students, school mates and at home may yield better results. The inculcation of this valuable trait in children can nurture a natural desire to do their best.
As adults, by focusing on our improvement and learning derived through the observation of our fellow members of society, there are a number of benefits we can reap in the long run.
Our pleasure in life will only enhance, when we focus on what we are and how we can become better than what we are today. Where do others come into our picture other than as inspirations?
Each of us have our own set of skills and talents. Many of them lie dormant for years before we realize them. The moment we start on a search to know ourselves better, our approach to competition will change. We will slowly begin to realize what we are capable of and be our own critical judge.
We need be our first critic and judge. If we believe we have done justice to something we will experience a sense of satisfaction. When we know that our performance is not up to the mark, then recognition or compliments will not take away the dissatisfaction we feel with our performance. As individuals seeking self development and who are our own critic, we become less susceptible to praises or criticisms.
Another challenge we face in our quest to compete with others, is that, we forget the valuable role that happiness and well being play in our lives. We forget the price we pay when we strive to compete with others for achieving our goals. Success is easier to define and achieve if you believe you know what makes you happy.
Competing with ourselves, in fact, allow us to be more happy viewing other’s growth, development and success. We are less likely to allow negative thinking to deviate our focus on achieving the success we have set out for ourselves too.
Once we know the definition of our success, then competition with others will be the farthest from our mind. Then begins our tournament of life, a tournament where we play by our own rules. A life long tournament that is not about winning but achieving what we wish to, by doing our best.