It is said that “We cannot control the wind, but we can control the sail”
Our attitude towards life, people and situations can be one of our biggest strengths or it can prevent us from getting the best out of our existence.
We sometimes come across those who are greatly upset with their existence – their lifestyle, health, children, people in their life and so on.
Of course, being upset temporarily does not classify a person to belong in the above category, but if complaining becomes a sole purpose of existence then it indeed is an acute case of enjoying being a victim. An approach to life is that is termed as “The Victim Mentality”.
The common characteristics of a person who enjoys being or playing a victim of life are that they are seldom positive, enjoys complaining (and not doing anything about changing the situation) and forever has a negative approach to life and people. Whereas, those with a “Growth Mindset” believe in a powerful philosophy towards life, that reflects optimism, energy and opportunities.
Acquiring some of the characteristics of those with a “Growth Mindset” are easier than we may imagine.
Visualization in attaining Success
Imagine and think positively about your future self. How would you like to be? What would like to see yourself as? How do you see the journey that will take you to your goal?
As a technique for harnessing our subconscious mind, “Visualization” allows us to enjoy the happiness of achieving the intended goal by visualizing the journey we’ll make to achieve it. It is also referred to it as “Mental Imagery”. This technique enables us to create the vision of the desired outcome of our efforts and enables us to work towards its successful completion.
The success of this technique lies in the fact that it not only drives us towards our desired goal but also sharpens our focus on the opportunities and resources (including mentors) around us that will help us achieve this.
Develop a Proactive Mentality
Get into action mode by deciding what you want to achieve. Prioritise tasks based on their importance, followed by evaluation of the tasks completed. Does the outcome give you the satisfaction you were looking for?
Take Responsibility for our Actions and Decisions
There are some situations where we know that it is not only our efforts that count but also environmental influences. In such situations too, our attitude affects our focus on the goal we seek. Taking charge of the situation by choosing to be part of it in our capacity, is a reflection of taking responsibility for our action and outcome of the situation. These situations are also valuable opportunities to learn and gain insight into what we need to do effectively and achieve what we desire in future.
Many years ago, while going through some particularly challenging time in my personal life, I used to look at the many “reasons” why I was not able to get things done the way I want to do them. It was only, much later, when I began to hold myself responsible for my actions that I began to feel more in control. I also began to realise that only the way we behave or respond to a situation can be solely determined by us. What we do not have direct control on, is how the environment or other members of society respond or behave with us. The sooner we accept this reality, the easier it becomes for us to see more value in the sensibility of our actions and words.
Refuse to play the “Blame Game”
Playing the “Blame Game” may provide temporary relief but it merely acts as a relief to our ego. It neither helps our mind focus harder on what we need to work on, to achieve our goal nor accept our shortcomings with grace. Before we indulge in this negative vicious “game”, asking ourselves the value of this mindless exercise can enable us to change our thinking. This will not only help us think logically but also keep our mind on the objective or purpose of our efforts in the situation.
Having a “Growth Mindset” does not merely help us become the best version that we can be, but interestingly, we would be doing the world a wonderful service. Through our quest to learn and become better, we help others to become better versions of who they are too.
If we were to look at some of the inspiring personalities in history (eg: Abraham Lincoln, Sarojini Naidu, Nelson Mandela etc) who made a positive impact to the world they lived in, we can observe that they would not have become whom they were without helping others to grow.