During the last 40 plus years, I’m not sure just how many souls have skillfully fleeced or tricked my Dad out of his hard earned money.
Dad’s intellect and brilliance has never affected his tendency to trust people. As a child, I have watched him lose money, watched perilous incidents where pretentious charming “friends” or strangers deftly escape with the money borrowed from Dad.
Not surprisingly, it has amazed me to no small extent, why Dad keeps letting this happen.
During my teens, I decided, that there definitely must a reason why Dad serenely allows history to repeat itself. After all, the number of incidents that he gets financially robbed does not seem to decrease.
Once, a situation was even more perplexing since it was an extremely wealthy individual who was the culprit. I could share my loving Mother’s exasperation that day. With a touch of teenage cynicism I quietly asked him just why he trusts people blindly? Surely life has given him far numerous incidents to learn not to trust others easily?
With a smile, Dad replied, “I would rather trust people and then get proven that my trust is misplaced than live being suspicious of everyone I come across. It affects the quality of my life”,
Admittedly, that answer then failed to convince me of its logic. In fact, I merely listened to him with a touch of sympathy. After all, his gullible and costly attitude towards life has affected him countless times and yet he refuses to learn.
My cynical youthful wisdom refused to consider the possible benefits that his attitude allows him to experience.
Years later, I observed that the truly contented souls whom I come across all share one remarkable quality. They trust others far more than many of us and refuse to look at others with suspicion unless proven otherwise.
How does trusting others help us to be happier?
It is a hard fact that our vulnerability indeed makes us susceptible to betrayal or treachery, whether in matters of money or the heart.
But, it is also an ironical fact that to experience true blissful state of happiness or love, trust is the one factor that enables the emergence of these feelings to flower in all its beauty.
A few of the reasons we experience a greater feeling of happiness when we trust is simple
We see Goodness in Others
Refuse to be Biased or Prejudiced
Refuse to be Judgmental
Value Individual Differences
We have Greater Tolerance for Shortcomings in Others
In the last couple of years, I decided to attempt to seek that elusive wisdom in the answer I had got from him many years ago.
I realized to my dismay, that in order to experience it, I would need to place aside my “shield of protection” that I always carry with me. An shield of mistrust and sharpness that had served me well all these years.
The question is, “Is it really worth the risk of being cheated, conned or betrayed?”
Looking at Dad, the serenity and contentment that I’ve observed him enjoy almost all the time tempted me. I wanted to enjoy that positive state of mind too.
Surely, the possibility of enjoying greater happiness is far more fantastic than worrying about the possibility of being cheated or conned?
We need not fear that by becoming more trusting we will surely be susceptible to swindlers. On the contrary, we can be careful but not to the extent that we risk ruining our happiness through our eternal speculation of whether a person is worthy of our trust.